Tragedy on its Most Minute Level

7:03PM - April showers brought May flowers

Work has gotten crazy.  I guess that will happen when 1/3 of the workforce is laid off and the remaining people still have to get things done.  But I'd rather be busy than bored.  I just wish it would even out sometimes....They also moved to a different floor at one of the offices I work in and I kind of hate it - it's a big open space that's loud, echo-y and industrial.  I liked the other floor much better.

I shouldn't complain too much though, because at the end of this month J and I are going to Iceland!  It's been on my "places to visit" list for 15+ years and now I'm finally going.  When I was growing up my family had an exchange student from Iceland who we've kept in touch with, so he's going to show us around.  I'm very excited and will have to take more pictures than I normally do (which is often none).

The warm weather has been a welcome change, even if it's been quite rainy - it's good for the blooming flowers and budding trees.  I've been able to go for some long walks and bike rides.  I even rode my bike to the gym the other night (this sounds better than it is - it's less than three miles away and I hadn't been to the gym in weeks).

Went to a Killers concert last week and almost died trying to make it through work the next day.  I'm going to do the same thing this week, though, with the Elton John/Billy Joel concert (we vowed to leave early - I'm getting way too old for this!).  We got a 10-pack of Brewers tickets, so we've been to a few games, which is always fun. 

Other than that, not too much is going on.  Oh, except that I put my townhouse up for sale and moved in with J.  which caused some weird family tension but felt like the right thing to do (although at the worst time...only two people have looked at it!). 

And, my brother is getting married!  He's getting sent off to do Army stuff for a little over a year, so they decided to get hitched before he left.  His almost-wife is awesome, so I'm very excited to have her as a "sister" (although I won't make it to their "legally binding agreement" - they'll have a "real wedding" when he gets back). 

6:37PM - One of these things is not like the other

I watched a romantic comedy movie-thon this weekend including: Notting Hill, Along Came Polly, How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, Sweet Home Alabama, and The Break Up.  I had previously seen all but the last two.  The thing was - The Break Up was not funny.  It was really, really sad.  It always seemed like it would be a comedy, but I definitely wouldn't classify it as one.  It had funny elements, sure, but overall was not funny.  In fact, I kind of want to cry just thinking about it.  So I'll stop.

Speaking of movies that are not funny, I found out that The Road is being made into a movie.  I know I should't see it, but I don't know if I'm going to be able to stop myself.  Viggo Mortensen one of the main characters and I am a sucker for his work, especially when he is bearded (Viggo as Aragorn = ♥).  Nightmares or bearded Viggo...what's a girl to do?

I finally ordered a "real" desk chair for my home office/guest room which arrived today.  If I can figure out how to assemble it, I will no longer have to sit in a squeaky dining room chair that was recovered from an alley.  Yay!

5:25PM - I can't get no satisfaction

Like most people in the Midwest in late January, I've been feeling blah lately.  And something else...there is this deep-seated feeling of being unsatisfied but I'm not sure with what.  I like my job - I enjoy what I do, but the past few weeks I've had to drag  myself out of bed and by 3pm I would give my left arm to be able to be done for the day.  And yet, even when I am done and go home, the feeling lingers.  Maybe I need to invest in one of those visors that shines simulated sunlight in your eyes, à la Northern Exposure.

Not helping matters: I read Cormac McCarthy's "The Road" a few weeks ago.  While it was incredibly well-written, it was also incredibly distubing and sort of horrifying.  J. had read it just before me and when I was about halfway through he asked me how I liked it.  In response, tears welled up in my eyes and my voice broke.  "Yeah," he said, "That's kind of how I felt."  He could have warned me!  I suppose my advice is that if you are going to read this book, do yourself a favor and don't do it in the dead of winter. 

In happier news I finally joined a gym and they offer several classes, which I plan to take advantage of.  As a bonus, they have a location near my house as well as near work.  Now if I can just motivate myself to go there on a regular basis....

2:15PM - A year in review type-thing

I imagine this will be my last post for 2008 (and probably until well into 2009 at my pace).  I promise it won't be all maudlin.

I went to MN to visit my family on the Sunday before Christmas and it was nonstop action until I got back home on the following Sunday night.  I read a book and a half, went through several boxes of stuff from high school and college so my parents can reclaim closet space (and found some fun stuff including some 50's glasses without lenses, a sash from when I ran for queen of my hometown (don't ask!), and a report on the Revolutionary War that is possibly the worst thing ever written by a 14-year-old).  Also found a container of change which I cashed in at the bank for $50 - score!  I spent lots and lots of time with my family, nuclear and extended.  My brother brought his girlfriend home and she's my new BFF, which he pretended to be disgusted by, but secretly he's probably happy.  J was supposed to come up for the weekend, but his flight got canceled because it was too foggy.  That was a real bummer.  I guess now we'll just have to go visit my brother in WA....which isn't a bad thing at all, but I think I'll wait until some of their snow has melted!

I got J a food processor for Christmas.  He tried it out and said he's kind of scared of it.  I hope he gets over his fear and makes me an apple pie or something.  It's amazing what those things can do.  He got me the entire series of Friends on DVD, which I'm very excited about.  They used to show reruns all the time, but now I rarely see an episode...now I can watch one whenever I want - yay!

My new job is going really well, I pretty much love it.  Other than being constantly worried that I'm going to get laid off, I don't have much to complain about.  It's amazing how different the corporate culture is from my last job - in a good way. 

I need to get back into a working out groove.  I used to go to a weight lifting class once a week and do some cardio and weight training once or twice a week at the gym at my old job, but now that I don't work there anymore I need to do something else.  I used to be all buff and now I'm getting kinda doughy.  Once I get into a schedule I think I'll be able to stick to it - it's figuring out the schedule (and finding a new gym!) that's hard.

It's officially been over a year since I bought my townhouse.  Even though it's consistently declined in value since I bought it (stupid economy!) I don't regret it.  This is the first time I've lived anywhere for more than one year in....well, years.  Staying put for a while was one of the reasons I bought a house, so it's been working.  And I love my garage, especially when it snows. 

So I really don't have much else to say other than I'm thankful that things have been going well and I'm happy to have my family and friends and I hope 2009 is a great year for everyone!

10:09PM - Bah. Humbug.

Things I should do this weekend:
-Get my oil changed - I've been putting it off for an extra 2,000 miles or so because I should also bring my car in for a tune up and I never know if I can trust car mechanics and I get really frustrated whenever I think about it.  Maybe if I start with the oil change the rest won't seem so bad. 
-See Twilight.  I'm on the third book in the series right now and although I don't find them to be the best books ever written, I cannot stop reading them.  Does this mean I'm actually a 14-year-old?  
-Cooking  - I've been craving risotto and I also found a recipe for stuffed portabello mushrooms.  And I think I might make some biscotti, though technically that's baking.
-Set up my tree and some decorations.  
-Go to the fabric store and exchange my patterns and get some fabric to make my niece and nephew pjs for Christmas that would actually fit them.  And I should start making the rest of my family fabric grocery bags.  It's not that I'm a cheapskate, my family agreed to forego exchanging gifts and instead invest the money we would have spent on gifts so we can all go on a vacation in a year or two.  We've been talking about it for years, but this year I'm going to demand the money.  Because that's what the spirit of Christmas is all about.

9:08PM - Life is demanding without understanding

Updates since my last post:
I finished painting.  Well, I finished painting what I'm willing to paint right now - my guest room/office still needs another coat since the previous owners seeminly only did one coat, but I'm not going to deal with that for a while.  Painting the stairwell was not fun, but I'm happy with the results.  And if I ever need to touch up, I have roughly 3 gallons of paint left - turns out buying a 5-gallon bucket was playing it way too safe.

My sewing class is now over.  I finished my tiny pajamas and they turned out pretty well, I must say.  If I weren't so digital camera-computer synching phobic I would take a photo and post it.  Someday I'll figure it all out.  That goes for sewing and for camera stuff.  On a related note, I had bought three patterns during a pattern sale and found them buried under a pile of fabric, etc. when I was cleaning the other day.  It's a good thing I never took them out of their envelopes because I realized I bought the wrong size for every single one of them.  Hopefully the store will let me exchange them.

I spent Thanksgiving with J's family, except his parents, who were spending the week with his sister and her family - it's all about the grandchildren.  It was also his birthday, so I think he felt a little bad about that, and he also had to work in the morning.  I tried to make it up to him the weekend before by taking him to Madison for the Badgers game.  We had fun - had lunch at Himal Chuli, did some shopping on State Street, went out for dinner. Oh, and we also went to Babcock where I had never been.  I realized I rarely went past Helen C White on campus - there is a whole other world back there.  The Badgers won the game in overtime but I was so cold that I forced an early exit and we only saw it on a TV at Union South.  Turns out going to a sedentary outdoor event in cold weather isn't all that great.  Nothing says "Happy Birthday" like freezing your ass off.   

Back to Thanksgiving: I was thankful to have people to spend the day with and thankful that my family had people to spend the day with as well- they were in good hands - my aunt is an amazing cook.  I made a pumpkin log, which might also be called a pumpkin roll.  I also made a raspberry cheesecake.  I ♥ dessert.  We also had turkey, mashed potatoes swirled with sweet potatoes, cranberry chutney, roasted root veggies, stuffing, rolls, crackers and cheese, and wine.  I said that since J's parents weren't around I could go a little crazy with the wine.  I don't think I actually did.  Then we played Wii for a really long time.

J has a Wii which is technically mine, but it lives at his house.  I have two Dance Dance Revolution mats which are technically J's and also live at his house.  Has anyone played DDR?  I find it frustrating, and yet I cannot stop playing it.  I have been known to try the same song five or more times in a row to attempt to improve my score.  The fact that the song is "The Sign" by an Ace of Base knockoff does not deter me.  The great thing about the Wii in general is that normally I get cold in the winter if I'm watching TV or reading, but now if I start getting cold I can play some Wii for a half hour and I warm up.  Long underwear help, too.  Unfortunately, the Wii does not travel easily, so right now my feet are like blocks of ice despite the jumping jacks I've been trying to do every so often to keep my blood circulatin'.

5:02PM - Ain't got time to post

I decided to paint my house.  The interior, the exterior has vinyl siding, and after painting inside I'm glad for that.  This weekend will mark the fourth weekend in a row I've painted.  I'm happy with the results, but man is it taking a long time.  And I doubt this will be the last weekend - I can't reach the top of my stairwell so I'll have to wait until I  get my hands on a ladder before I finish that.

Other than that, I've been busy learning how to do my new job.  So far I still like it a lot!  It's a more relaxed atmosphere, although I'm much busier and a lot more is expected of me (or maybe it just feels that way).  Being busier and having more responsibility doesn't sound like a more relaxed atmosphere, but people are more accepting of mistakes and are nicer about taking time to help and explain things.

I have to second limb_of_satan 's assertion that all this darkness really sucks.  I raced home from work the other night to try to fit in a bike ride and it was nearly dark by the time I got back.  I managed to get a ride in but had to race home before it got scary-to-ride-a-bike dark.  Ugh.  Maybe that's why all the bike commuters are in such a hurry - they want to get home before they get run over by someone with poor night vision.

Not much else to report.  I'm taking a sewing class so I will know how to read a pattern soon (I hope).  It's kind of nice because there are only two other people in the class so there's lots of personal attention.  That reminds me, I need to leave so I can pick up some supplies before it starts. Yay sewing!

Oh, also how exciting was election night?!

9:02PM - These boots were made for walkin'

So I got a new job.  At another behemoth company that starts with an "M" ends in an "a" and in the middle is "otorol".  So far it seems to be going well, though it's only my second day.  I have a lot to learn, so it's overwhelming but that's true of any new job.

I'm very happy to be out of my previous job.  It had become a toxic work environment and I never felt like I could be myself.  People seem more friendly and willing to joke around at the new job...I'm hoping this isn't just a first impression but proves to be true.  Also, the average age is probably about 20 years younger that Big Pharma and not that I'm an ageist, but it makes a difference to be around people closer to my age.  I also felt like my manager at my previous job was trying to make my work life miserable, which he succeeded in doing, to force me out.  Part of me assumed I was being paranoid, but one of my now-former co-workers forwarded an email that my former manager sent out announcing that his "pet" employee had taken over my position.  Took all of one day.  Coincidence? I think not.

I don't need to worry about it anymore though.  It feels sort of good to know that my intuition was correct.  I'm not looking back, that's for sure.

That's about all I've been up to.  Finding and starting a new job has kept me plenty busy, to which I'm sure several of you can attest. 

8:50PM - Hurts so good?

Over the weekend I randomly participated in a triathlon.  The family of one of J's friends has been putting on an informal one for the past 7-8 years.  I was just going to volunteer but got talked into doing it the day before.  And I pretty much wish I hadn't.  I am the worst swimmer ever, even after taking lessons.  I get panicky because I can't seem to get the breathing/rhythm down and then I get exhausted.  So I ended up doing the elementary backstroke for most of the half mile.  I'm just surprised I stayed in the water that long without freaking out about snakes, snapping turtles, Northern Pike, etc.  I will say, though, that at one point a bird of prey was circling above me, and I thought "Oh great, I'm so slow that the buzzards are going to come eat me."  They didn't.  But they did have to postpone the next heat until I finished.  Which is too embarrassing for words. 

Next was a 7 mile bike to a park to do a 3 mile run.  Which I mostly walked because when I tried to run I got really tired and my ankles hurt. And I'm not a huge fan of running.  And I'm really not a huge fan of running up hills on uneven terrain.  Then I got to bike 7 miles back.  As I was finishing the "run" several people from the last heat, which had started half an hour after I finished the swim had already caught up to me and passed me like I wasn't even moving on the bike.  I kept telling myself that I wasn't going to let anyone else pass me, but people kept passing me on hills when I had nothing more in me.  I simply could not find any strength  to keep up with them, much less stay in front of them.  Toward the end, I was pretty sure I was catching up to 2 girls who had been in my heat and I was trying really hard to pass them.  So hard that I was sort of throwing up in my mouth and almost crying.  But I didn't catch up to them.  I did finish, though.  Then I almost fell off my bike when I tried to get off it because I was so shaky.  I guess that'll happen when you don't eat much before you set out and don't train. I don't think my usual 45-minute workouts 3 days a week did a lot to prepare me for 2+ hours of intense exercise. 

I guess you could say it's good that I tried it and at least I finished.  But I was really embarrassed and disappointed by how badly I did.  Even though people were really nice and supportive, it was really disheartening to keep getting passed by everyone when I was giving 110%.  I've never been a big competitor when it comes to athletic events, so I don't know why I should expect to be now.  I guess it's just not my thing. Well, now I know for next time :)
       
In other news, I went to a high school production of "Rent" that was quite well done.  I had to smile reading the bios because so many of the kids in it wanted to have professional acting careers.  Ah, to be so young and naive.  I saw the last of 7 performances and the entire cast was all emotional and crying during the last scenes.  It was very sweet.

Continuing to look for a different job.  I'm having trouble motivating myself to look for positions and put together cover letters and resumes.  I spend so much time on my computer at work that when I get home it's the last thing I want to do.  But I'm going to have to figure something out if I want to move on.  I think part of it might be fear of change that's preventing me from sitting down and cranking out some applications.  That, and I'm not really sure what I want to do.  Sigh.

9:45PM - Pretending to be strong and free

I'm stuck in this weird abyss of self-doubt where I'm scared to apply for other jobs.  I think it's because I've grown complacent.  I want a change but I don't want a change.  I've sent out three résumés and have gotten one rejection letter, one "don't contact us, we'll contact you" and one phone interview that turned into an invitation for a real interview.  Which, statistically speaking, isn't bad.  But I have a feeling I'm going to need to apply to WAY more jobs than that before I find the 'perfect' one.  I'm also worried that I'm going to be pigeonholed and if I want to do something different than what I'm doing it's going to be an uphill battle.  And also, I'm terrified that I'm somehow going to go into foreclosure on my house, even though that is not even close to a reality at this time.  It's just one of those things that needlessly keeps me up at night.

As I whined to one of my coworkers (before she disappeared through the revolving door that is my group) "Why does everything have to be so hard?"

But seriously, I think when you are a person who normally wakes up starving and for several months you wake up feeling nauseous on weekdays, it's time for a change. Now I just need to turn the "what ifs" into a "so what, you'll get over it."

Boy I'm whiny.  And shiny.  The heat and humidity is doing a number on my skin.  I could grease a frying pan with my face.  

Speaking of heat and humidity, I'm heading to the Charleston area this weekend.  I'm thinking it will be a good time. I'm going to pack lots of sunscreen and hope that tropical storm has said its goodbyes to the area.  I'm also packing several books. I've been trying to read more lately (and succeeding for the most part). But it's hard when 'So You Think You Can Dance' is on two nights a week!  

9:26PM - Parlez vous anglais

 After a passionate phone call from a friend re: the Canon Elph series, I went out and bought one. Then I sort of figured out how to use it.  It took some pretty good pictures, I must say.  Now if I can just get the gumption to put them on my computer, I can post them to Flickr and share the Canadian fun.

Montreal was a good time. I'd recommend it and I'd go back.  Quebec City? Not so much...it was fine, but personally I liked Montreal a lot more.  We went to the big park in the middle of the city and walked around. We ate croissants and had some excellent meals.  We ate poutine (fries covered with cheese curds and gravy--which sounds gross but is so, so awfully good).   We walked around a lot and did a little bit of shopping. It was just nice to be away from work and everything else for a while.  

I had a complete meltdown at work the day before we left and without going into too much detail, I ended up storming out of a meeting while saying "I don't have to take this" and trying to slam the door (unfortunately the door was on a hydraulic so I just lost my balance a little bit instead).  It's difficult for me to remember the last time I was that angry.  I try not to talk about my job here because I'm lucky to have one, etc. but I have really grown to dislike it.  If I'm being honest with myself, I didn't like it from the start and it hasn't gotten any better.  I think it's time to dust off my résumé.

I went to New Glarus this weekend to do some biking and some camping.  On Saturday, we got a little wet during the biking in some random downpours.  Then it decided to start pouring in the middle of the night.  Luckily the tent didn't leak, but it did get some wicked condensation.  The plan had been to do some more biking on Sunday, but since it was so wet, muddy, and mosquito-y we decided to just pack it all up and go home.  Which turned out to be fine, as there were continued random showers throughout the day (which didn't help drying out our gear!).

In other news, my keyboard has decided it's not going to let me use most of the numbers along the top row (or their corresponding symbols), which is really annoying.  Do you have any idea how many parentheses and exclamation points are in this post!?  I keep having to find random instances of punctuation and symbols elsewhere and paste them in.  First my keyboard that came with my computer shorted out after I dropped a staple in it (really, it did!) now my "virtually indestructible" keyboard is malfunctioning.  And the warranty was only good for a year.  Sigh. They just don't make them like they used to.  It was just working the other day...I don't know what happened.

Hopefully this post didn't come across as negative.  I had a rough couple of weeks there where I felt like everything was going to hell in a handbasket, but I've managed to harness that and try to be positive about making some changes in my life.  It's just a little scary, that's all.

9:08PM - I need somebody

 I'm only going to post because I need some help/advice.  I've decided to maybe dip my toes in the "digital revolution." No, I didn't buy an ipod.  Rather, I'm thinking of buying a digital camera. 

What are some of the features I should look for?  Keep in mind that this will be my first digital camera so I don't need anything too complicated or fancy, but I'd still like something that will take nice pictures and be easy to use (and also not too expensive, I'd like to stay around $200 or less).  What are megapixels and how many do I need?  How much digital zoom and optical zoom do I need?  Also, what's the deal with batteries...Are they usually rechargeable or what and how long do they last?

There is a trip to Canada in the near future and I'd like to be able to take a few pictures that aren't taken with my disposable camera that expired a couple of years ago.  That still has over half the photos left on it. That's how often I take pictures.  

I had to call a hotel and they answered the phone in French. I have a phone-phobia to begin with, and when the person on the other end isn't speaking a language I'm familiar with it scares me real bad.  I managed a "parlez vous angles?" (no clue if I spelled that right) then they switched to English which helped me relax a little.  I've been trying to think of French words I know to help me get by: croissant, escargot, fillet mignon, bonjour, au revoir, e vous?, sacre bleu, fromage, tres chic, and of course crepe.  That about covers any situation, don't you think? If I'm looking for a bathroom, I'll make a squatting motion, which I think is universal.

8:52PM - She blogs! She blogs!

I finally got my shamrock shake on a pit stop during the pre-Easter snowstorm. It was deliciously awful. I made the best of the snow by making egg-shaped snow sculptures and coloring them with leftover Easter egg dye. Suck on that, winter!

I was the lucky recipient of a sewing machine for Christmas.  Even though I've wanted one for ~10 years I was kind of scared of it. However, I was able to overcome my fear and recently finished making a grocery-type bag out of a canvas-y material.  The pattern suggested it would take about 2-3 hours but I think it took me substantially longer than that.  The next one should go faster now that I know what to expect.  I hope to someday sew clothing but clothing patterns are daunting.  I'll have to ease into it. Kind of like how I eased into knitting. First I learned how to knit, then to purl, then I figured out cables, increasing, decreasing, felting, etc.  I think once I even figured out intarsia but I wouldn't be able to tell you how to do it now.  Someday I hope to figure out Fair Isle even.  

But I digress.  

People at church were wearing jeans. On Easter. That really bothers me. I am not a religious person but you should really step up on Easter. When I was little everyone dressed to the nines and some ladies wore fancy hats even.  Most people probably went home and changed into sweatpants but they made the effort. Feel free to wear jeans to church on any given Sunday, but on Easter Sunday please wear something nice.  Is nothing sacred anymore?!

8:29PM - whooooooaaaaa

Here it comes....I heard a commercial for the McDonald's shamrock shake on the radio tonight. Although I'll probably wait until March, it's good to know it's out there.

Speaking of ice cream goodness...Ben & Jerry's Cinnamon Bun? Awesome!!!!  That reminds me, I still have some cinnamon rolls from the Madison Farmer's Market in my freezer.  How did that happen?

One of my coworkers sent me this, which I've set as my background at work and is currently making me squeal every five seconds.

In case you're wondering why I'm posting again so soon, it's because I am once again putting off the indexing. I got through the first pass but I'm really having trouble with the second run-through.

9:40PM - Procrastination is the best motivation....

 the best motivation for making a blog entry, that is.

I'm supposed to be indexing a book right now, but I got hungry, then I finished watching the show I started when I was making dinner. Then I got a phone call. I think I lost my groove.  I'd better find it again though unless I want to spend all weekend indexing.

I made pancakes for dinner. I believe it was the late Mitch Hedberg who said "Pancakes...all exciting at first, then you're f***ing sick of them."  Couldn't agree more right now. I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.

I got my first heating bill today, which was less than my "worst case scenario." I figure since Jan-Feb are generally the coldest months this is about as bad as it's going to get.  That makes me feel a little better.  Surprisingly, I think my budget is working, more or less. I still get panicky sometimes but for the most part I feel good.  I've heard that it takes about 6 months to feel completely comfortable with the fact that your entire life savings is now tied up in a piece of real estate. I just need to stop listening to the media and their talk of a "recession" and/or an "economic downturn" and focus on my "tax rebate" and how I'm going to invest it.

In a frightening new development, I've apparently gone Republican.  I took k_bel's USA Today quiz and nearly fell out of my chair when I got the results.  All elephants. My dad is sure proud of me!  I'm having trouble scraping my jaw off the floor.

9:30PM - Gobble Gobble Goo

I remain extremely excited about "the (first) largest purchase of my life." Even as I begin to suspect that I'm getting a little bit screwed over by my mortgage guy. Oh, well. There was a fax on my chair this morning with the details of my closing which is in just a little over a week. Eeeeee!

I had quite a lovely Thanksgiving. I took Wednesday afternoon off from work and went out to lunch with some co-workers before heading to J.'s to make a pumpkin roll (aka pumpkin log). It didn't look as nice as last year's Christmas banana nut roll (aka banana log) but it tasted good. J. and his cousin (who is also temporarily his roommate) took care of the bulk of the meal and I met some additional family members. May or may not have made kind of an ass of myself when his dad entered the room with a glass of what appeared to be beer and I loudly said "Ooh! Is that the Apple Spice beer?" "No," he replied, deadpan, "It's apple cider." Oops. What can I say--the Leinie's Apple Spice gets me all excited.

What doesn't get me all excited? The thought of getting  up early when I don't have to. So I saved my Post-T-Day shopping for late Saturday morning. I bought some bedding for my guest room (so aka_lusi will have a comfy place to sleep when she's around--and anyone else who may decide to drop by) and some flatware so more than a few people can eat at once (also so I won't need to do dishes so often ; ) and saw a whole bunch of stuff that I wanted but totally, totally didn't need.
 
Then I had to go back to work today. Blech. Oh, who am I kidding? It's not that bad. And this is the last full week I'll have to work in a long time, so I think I can manage. 

3:38PM - over now

I survived my first conference speaking experience, thank goodness.  It wasn't too bad, but I did get incredibly nervous about an hour before I spoke and was unable to concentrate at all on the speaker ahead of me.  But I didn't throw up or pass out or anything.

I think it went pretty well.  I had 30 min. to talk, but I only used about 20.  I was expecting people to have questions, but only 2 people did, so I finished early. It all evened out though, because the speaker after me went long.  I got a few laughs out of the audience (which I noticed had been lacking the rest of the day--I realize the subject matter isn't exciting, but that's why it needs to be spiced up!).  Also, I passed out nutrition bars my company makes and people seemed to like that (especially since I spoke just after a break and apparently they didn't have snacks available).  I guess the love of free food doesn't go away once you graduate from college.

It was nice to get away from work for a while and hear about and be inspired(?) by what others are doing, but it got to be a long time away from home.  I got to see 

simpledarksquid and even though she wasn't feeling well, it was nice to have someone I knew around--making small talk with people for four straight days was exhausting! And if she hadn't been there, I probably would have been too scared to walk around by myself after dark the rest of the week (the woman working at the hotel when I checked in warned me not to walk around by myself at night, but it didn't seem too bad to me once I saw what it was like--all the same, it was nice that she warned me).   

So it was nice to be away, but it's good to be home. Especially since my downstairs neighbors have moved out. It's so quiet now!  There was huge drama last weekend when my landlords asked them to leave since they hadn't been paying their rent.  They left all right, but they left a huge mess and their dogs (with no food or water, mind you) too!  So the dogs were alone in the apartment for around 18 hours before animal control finally came to get them.  How could someone do that?! I hate to think what would have happened if I hadn't realized what was going on and alerted them to the situation. Ugh. I will be so glad to move into my own place. Less than a month now!

 

10:12PM - What have I done?

 So....I just made an offer on a townhome and after a bit of negotiation, an offer was agreed upon and accepted.  I'm supposed to close in early December, so whoever wants to stay with me at the end of the month will now have deluxx accommodations (provided nothing goes wrong, please don't let anything go wrong!).

I'm not excited about moving again (move #12? 13? in 8 years--holy crap!), but since I'm buying this place I'll sort of be forced to stay there for a while. And I'm going to look into hiring movers.  When a friend moved over the summer she hired movers and they were freakin' amazing.
 
Now I'm going to bed. This has been a rather exhausting weekend. I'm excited, but I also feel like throwing up.

8:32PM - What's going on?

I attended my cousin's wedding in MN a few weeks ago and my Mom asked me what I do after work and on weekends. I thought about it for a moment, then answered honestly "I don't really know, but I'm always busy."  So I suppose I can say I don't have time to blog because I'm busy, but I don't know what I'm busy doing. Well, there are a few things....

10:05PM

Along (sorta) the same lines as limb_of_satan's post:
About 3-4 months ago I bought 2 new bras and they came with a coupon that you could send in to get another one in the same size/style mailed to you. I *just* got it this week and it's not the same style...it's some pushup/lace thing. Apparently they ran out of the one I wanted and they thought I'd enjoy this one.  It could be a lot worse, but I'm still disappointed. Sometimes I wish bra manufacturers would realize that those of us with smaller breasts don't necessarily want them to look bigger. Bra shopping is the worst!

As I've been largely absent from my posting duties lately, I will try to be brief in my updates so as not to overwhelm anyone:

-I finished the slides for my presentation at the conference and have even practiced it once! I feel much better having that out of the way and am much less worried now.

-Things continue to go well with J. I think he might be the nicest person I've ever met. (No disrespect to the nice people reading this.)

-My downstairs neighbors continue to get on my nerves by being themselves.  I try to be patient with them because I think they have a hard life, but they are so different from me that it's frustrating. They have 2-3 children (I've seen 2, but I think there might be a baby, too?) and are always yelling at them, which is just what you want to hear at 7a.m. (keeping a fan on at night has helped). They don't understand the concept of recycling or of keeping the yard free of cigarette butts/wrappers/etc. And they don't seem to understand the importance of shutting, much less locking, the common doors (they do close the screen doors, at least!). It's annoying, but not intolerable. Nevertheless, it's making me seriously consider buying a house/condo/townhome.  But would I be able to commit to one place long enough to make it worth it? The drama!

There's more but I'm having trouble thinking. I'll have to try to post more often...

So I don't end on kind of a bad note I'll share a funny story: I was driving to work last week and went past a group of what appeared to be 7-8 year-old schoolchildren waiting for the bus. One of them suddenly took off his shirt and started waving it around his head like he was a soccer player or something. Or maybe he was really excited to go to school.  Either way, it was hilarious!